


Shatterdome Park

by BaronVonChop



Category: Pacific Rim (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Amusement Park, Amusement Parks, Fluff, Hermann is a roller coaster inspector, M/M, Newt is the chief engineer, Pre-Relationship, Roller Coasters, The Jaegers are roller coasters run by their pilots, The Shatterdome is an amusement park
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2018-04-16
Packaged: 2019-04-23 20:51:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14340669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BaronVonChop/pseuds/BaronVonChop
Summary: Hermann is a roller coaster inspector who gets a tour of the Shatterdome amusement park from Newt, the chief engineer.





	Shatterdome Park

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know much about how amusement parks work. Please don't worry about it! It's all just an excuse for fluff, anyway.
> 
> Thanks, as always to my beta reader, who also suggested some great bits!

The amusement park’s steel-colored gates have large rivets, with rust painted on in places. Tall numbers are stenciled above each ticket booth, along with a stylized eagle with a star between its raised wings. Chunky yellow lines on the ground show people where to form lines.

When his turn comes, Hermann Gottlieb steps up to the ticket booth. He adjusts the sleeves of his jacket. “Erm, hello...”

“Welcome to the Shatterdome!” says the smiling young man behind the counter. He wears a blue shirt, suspenders, and a bow tie, and his black hair is slicked back from his forehead. “How many tickets?”

“One moment,” Hermann says. He switches his cane from his right hand to his left, takes out his wallet, and shows his identification. “I am not here to ride rollercoasters, but to inspect them. I believe you were notified?”

“Oh yeah! Hey there, I’m Tendo.” He sticks his hand through the hole at the bottom of the window. Hermann stares at it for a second before taking it and giving it an awkward shake. Tendo continues, “Let me just get Mr. Pentecost. I’ll be right back!” He stands, opens the door at the back of the booth, and steps out.

After a few moments, Tendo returns, followed by a man with close-cropped hair and a neat mustache. He is wearing a dark blue suit, the crisp lines emphasizing his confident bearing. Hermann stands up a little straighter just looking at the man.

Tendo waves Hermann through the turnstile. Once Hermann has entered the park, Tendo says, “This is Stacker Pentecost. He’s the park’s founder and owner. He pretty much runs the show around here! Now, sorry, I gotta get back to the booth. Hope you like the park!”

Pentecost offers his hand to Hermann. He has an excellent handshake, firm and sincere. “Mr. Gottlieb,” Stacker says. “Welcome.”

“Thank you,” Hermann says. He fights the urge to salute. “This is quite an interesting park you have here.”

Pentecost clasps his hands behind his back and looks around. “We may not be the largest park in the region, but we pride ourselves on offering exceptional ride experiences on all of our roller coasters.”

While Hermann is sure that Pentecost has repeated similar words many times before, the conviction with which he says them banishes any doubt from Hermann’s mind. “I appreciate you coming out to meet me in person.”

Pentecost has the face of someone who smiles rarely, so when he does, Hermann feels honored. “Of course. I look forward to reading your report.” He spots someone hurrying toward them and gestures toward the person. “Ah, and here we have the person who will be giving you the tour. Mr. Gottlieb, may I introduce Newton Geiszler.”

The man who has just arrived, puffing and flushed, has spiky black hair, glasses, and colorful tattoos of roller coasters looping and spiralling over his arms. He is wearing a white button-up shirt and a too-loose black tie. He takes a deep breath, blows it out, and gives Hermann a grin, “What’s up?”

Hermann sags at the realization that Pentecost will not be giving him the tour. The newcomer seems like a disappointing substitute.

“Newton is our chief engineer,” Pentecost says, giving the man a stern look. “Remember, Mr. Gottlieb is here for a tour of the roller coasters. Don’t go dragging him to the arcade or the children’s show.”

“Aw, but this month’s show is so good! All the Jaegers battle the kaiju in a pillow factory, and then Striker Eureka and Mutavore sing a duet…”

“Newton.”

“Okay, okay, just the coasters.”

Pentecost turns to Hermann. “Now, if you will excuse me, I must be getting back. Good day, Mr. Gottlieb!”

Hermann’s hand unconsciously rises toward a salute, but he notices in time to turn it into an awkward wave. “You too!” That leaves him with Newton Geiszler. He takes a deep breath. “So, Newton…”

“You can call me Newt.” Newt’s smile is slightly manic. “So, do you like the park so far?”

“It’s not about liking,” Hermann says, his voice crisp, “It’s about whether the park meets safety protocols!”

“Well, don’t you worry about that!” Newt says. “The Shatterdome is the safest park I know. We’ve never had a major accident since we opened.”

Hermann takes out his notepad and clicks his pen. “No major accidents, you say? So you’ve had minor accidents?”

“Uh, I think we’re getting off on the wrong foot,” Newt says, looking around nervously.

“Indeed.” Hermann rests his hands on his cane’s handle.

Newt rallies. “I think you’re gonna love the Shatterdome,” he says as he leads Hermann into the park. He quickly adds, “Around here, we friggin’ love safety protocols!”

It is past midday, and the sun warms the last of the morning chill from the air. Hermann can smell the familiar sweet scent of caramel corn and cotton candy, so ubiquitous in amusement parks. Sure enough, a nearby stand sells treats and snacks. A freckled woman buys popsicles for herself and her partner. The packaging is surprisingly minimalist, decorated only with the eagle logo and the word “Popsicle” in blocky letters.

Near a skyline-shaped fountain, a group of children swarm a costumed park mascot, who looks like a chunky blue-gray sea monster with a big soft blade for a nose. The kids giggle loudly as they thwack the mascot’s legs with toy swords, knives, circular saw blades, and fists, all made of foam.

Newt waves. “Hey, Knifey, how’s it going?”

The mascot waves back before returning its attention to the kids, making sure their guardians get good pictures.

As they keep walking, Hermann asks, “Is it safe to have the children accost your mascots like that?”

Newt smiles. “Perfectly safe! The mascot costumes are well padded, the weapons are soft foam, and the guys in the suits are trained to calm the kids down if they get too wound up. The worst thing that happened was a few parents got too close while taking a picture and got a foam sword in the junk.” He chuckles.

Hermann clicks his pen. “How badly were their genitals injured?”

Newt clears his throat. “Oh, wouldya look at that, we’ve arrived at Cherno Alpha!”

The old-fashioned wooden roller coaster is painted to look like heavy steel, with fat girders and chunky cars. The whole structure is painted a military shade of green, and the staircase where riders wait to board looks vaguely like a nuclear cooling tower.

“Come on!” Newt enthuses, tugging Hermann’s sleeve like an excited kid. “Let’s go!”

Hermann keeps his feet planted. “Certainly not!” He taps his cane for emphasis. “I came here to inspect roller coasters, not to ride them!”

Newt’s eyes widen as he takes in the cane as though seeing it for the first time. “Oh, uh, sorry dude, I mean, would that be okay for you? If your leg, uh, if you can’t…”

Hermann, suddenly self-conscious, looks up at the coaster to keep from looking at Newt. “No, it is not that kind of… I am perfectly capable of riding a roller coaster without fear of injury or discomfort. Well, beyond the usual discomfort people experience when riding roller coasters, I suppose.”

Newt beams with relief. “Awesome! Then let’s rock and roll!”

“You mistake me.” Hermann tilts his chin back. “Just because I am physically capable of riding a roller coaster does not mean that I wish to do so.”

For several seconds, Newt stares at Hermann, his eyes bugging and mouth agape. When he finds his voice, he says, “Dude! You can’t be serious!”

“I assure you, I am absolutely serious! I take great pride in my job, and I intend to give these coasters a thorough, proper inspection.”

“But-but… well, yeah, I know you gotta inspect them, but… don’t you want to ride them first?” Newt’s eyes are so wide, his face so stricken, then Hermann hesitates. Newt notices his opening. “How can you get a good feel for a coaster without riding it first?” Starting to warm to the argument, he adds, “That way, you can get a real sense for how riders feel! It’s hard to account for things like nausea or G-forces with formulas and calculations.”

Hermann draws himself up. “I’ll have you know that I have formulas for calculating both of those things. Furthermore, my inspections deal primarily with the condition of the roller coasters, as the rider experience should have already been thoroughly tested and approved before the coasters entered service.”

“Of course, of course!” Newt says, his mind clearly racing. “Okay, so, what if you were to ride the coasters to, um, for… fun?”

Hermann’s upper lip twitches. “Fun?”

Newt sags. “Yeah, I mean, that’s the ‘amusement’ part of ‘amusement park.’ Or I guess we could just go around tapping rivets and checking welds.”

Hermann studies Newt. “This isn’t just a ruse to hide the shoddy state of your coasters, is it?”

Newt splutters. “No way! My guys and I keep this place in totally awesome condition!”

“Well…”

Newt steps closer to Hermann and places his hands on Hermann’s shoulders. Hermann looks at Newt’s hands, his eyes widening slightly, but he does not remove them. Newt looks into Hermann’s face, suddenly serious. “When was the last time you rode a roller coaster?”

Hermann lowers his eyes and mumbles something.

“I didn’t hear that, but you know what? It doesn’t matter. Because today, you’re riding a roller coaster. And not just one: every major roller coaster at the Shatterdome!”

With that, Newt takes Hermann’s hand and marches him toward the stairs leading up to Cherno Alpha. It is not until he has taken several steps that Newt realizes how familiar the gesture might be. He looks back to check on Hermann. Hermann looks down with a cough. Newt loosens his grip on Hermann’s hand, but Hermann doesn’t let go, so Newt continues to lead him until they reach the stairs.

A sizable line of people wait on the stairs, but Newt leads Hermann past them, saying, “Roller coaster inspector, coming through! ‘Scuse us! We’re on official business!”

Hermann whispers out of the side of his mouth, “Newton, perhaps you should not tell them we are inspectors… it may give the wrong impression…”

“Nonsense,” Newt laughs, “I cut in line to inspect the coasters all the time! It’s good to let people know we keep a close eye on things.”

Hermann gives Newt a skeptical look, but he mumbles, “Well, all right.”

When they reach the top, they enter the station and see the couple who operate the ride. “Sasha, Aleksis, meet Hermann. He’s here to inspect our coasters.”

Hermann looks up and keeps looking up at the bleached-blond woman and man grinning down at him.

“A pleasure to meet you!” the woman enthuses. She puts out her hand to shake. “I am Sasha Kaidanovsky. This is my husband, Aleksis. And this,” she indicates the roller coaster with a grand sweep of her arm, “is Cherno Alpha, the strongest there is!”

Hermann shakes Sasha’s and Aleksis’ hands. “Yes, it certainly looks strong,” he stammers.

Aleksis leads them to the front seats. “For you,” he says. He takes Hermann’s cane as Hermann takes a seat.

After Hermann and Newt have boarded the car, Sasha sticks out her chest proudly. “It may not have fancy loops or corkscrews, but Cherno Alpha has power unlike any other! You will feel it when you ride, trust me. Little man, you will feel as tall as Aleksis!” Sasha steps over to Aleksis, who grins. She stands on her toes to peck him on the cheek with her bright red lips.

The other riders start to board the train. When the car is fully loaded, the Kaidanosvkys lower the safety bar across everyone’s laps. A few moments later, the car starts its clanking climb of the first hill. “Enjoy the ride!” Sasha calls, as she and her husband both wave.

Hermann glances over at Newt, who is bouncing in his seat with excitement. Hermann lays his hands on the bar across his lap, frowning. He looks over the side of the car, at the rest of Cherno Alpha. The peaks and valleys look steeper now that he is on board.

The car nears the top. They have a good view of the park, and Hermann can see the other major roller coasters--one red, one gray, and one blue--and the booths of food and games between them, where crowds of people walk. Then their car crests the top of the hill. From the front seat, all Hermann can see is the track leading down, down. His stomach feels like it’s traveling upward in his torso as the car plummets along the track, gaining speed with a growing roar. People behind him scream. Next to him, Newt puts his hands in the air, grinning so wide it makes Hermann’s face hurt just looking at him.

Hermann clutches the bar in his lap as the car finishes its descent and climbs the next hill. This time, he does not have much time to look around before they zoom down the other side. As they continue along the track, Hermann feels overwhelmed by the roar of the car, the shouts of the passengers, and his own stomach alternately rising toward his lungs or plummeting through his intestines.

He is not sure when it begins, but he starts to get used to the motion. He can feel the power surging through the car, and he remembers Sasha’s prediction. He even lifts his hands off the bar for a moment and utters a little whoop before quickly grabbing the bar again.

The car slides into the station and the bar lifts. Newt gets out first, and when Hermann rises to his feet, he feels a little unsteady from the adrenaline. He leans against the side of the car, and Newt offers his hand.

“It’s a rush, huh?” Newt asks, helping Hermann from the car. Hermann nods, both to answer Newt’s question and to thank him for his assistance.

Aleksis comes over with Hermann’s cane, which Hermann gratefully takes back. “Well?” Aleksis asks, beaming, while his wife glances over, a curious smile on her red lips.

“It was really… quite... “ Hermann tries to think of the right word. “Strong.”

“Ha!” Sasha shouts, pleased. She lifts an arm and flexes an impressive muscle. “Like I said: the strongest there is!”

“Indeed,” Hermann replies. He follows the other passengers as they depart. “Thank you very much.”

“Sure,” Aleksis rumbles, his deep voice gentle.

Hermann follows Newt down the stairs. Newt turns his head to ask Hermann, “So, what should we ride next?”

“Just give me a moment,” Hermann says. “That was really quite an experience.”

“Yeah, of course, no problem. Whenever you’re ready.”

They reach the bottom of the stairs and look around. A bell dings as someone wins a hammer game, and Hermann notices for the first time that all of the carnival games nearby are tests of strength.

Newt spots an unoccupied bench, so they sit down and stretch their legs. Nearby, several kids tromp through a play area, gleefully toppling child-sized foam buildings while roaring happily. A park mascot wearing a costume with an axe-shaped head keeps an eye on the kids in case they start to get out of control.

“Are you all right?” Newt asks, his eyebrows raised with concern.

Hermann gives him a shaky smile. “Yes, thank you. That was quite exhilarating, actually. I just needed to recover my breath.”

Newt sags with relief. “Whew! I was worried.”

“I appreciate your concern.” He squints over to where the kids are playing. The park mascot is going around righting the buildings so that the kids can knock them down again. “It’s not every day you see a giant monster rebuilding a city,” he says with a chuckle.

“Hey, I didn’t know you were a kaiju fan!” Newt exclaims, his voice climbing an octave.

“Well, no, I mean, I’m familiar with the basics…”

Newt’s leans in close to Hermann, his gaze so intent that Hermann leans away reflexively. “Who’s your favorite?”

“I don’t really have…” Hermann pauses when he sees Newt’s face fall. Hermann sighs. “Well, Godzilla, I suppose.”

Newt nods. “Gotta respect the classics!”

Hermann stands up, feeling much steadier on his feet. “I believe I am recovered. Where to next?”

Newt bounds up. “Let’s hit Striker Eureka! Now that you’ve mastered the oldest coaster in the park, let’s ride the newest!” He swings an enthusiastic fist through the air.

Hermann hesitates. “Shouldn’t we perhaps work our way up to it?”

Newt beckons him onward, and Hermann starts to follow. “Nah, trust me, you’ll love it!”

Only grumbling a little bit, Hermann allows Newt to lead him to Striker Eureka. Striker is near the video game arcade, and they hear a cacophony of beeps and chimes over the sounds of simulated engines and explosions as they pass it. Newt gives the building a longing look.

Striker Eureka is a sleek sleek gray coaster has two tight loops rising above it, looking almost like wings. As Hermann and Newt climb toward the station, Hermann spots a group of shouting riders passing nearly overhead.

“You did not say it is an inverted coaster!”

Newt pauses and looks back at Hermann. “Is that a problem?”

Hermann sighs. “I am not fond of having my legs dangling out in space!”

Newt’s forehead creases with concern. “Oh, because of your leg? I didn’t--”

He waves away Newt’s apology. “No, it’s not because of my leg. It’s just that I prefer to keep my feet safely on the ground, or as it were, on the floor of the car.”

Newt thinks it over. “Have you actually tried it?”

“Of course I’ve tried it!” Hermann says, a little more sharply than he had intended. “Although,” he adds, somewhat more gently, “it has been a while…”

“Well, let’s just take a closer look at it,” Newt offers. Before Hermann can respond, he adds, “I won’t try to trick ya. If you don’t want to ride, you can always say so, and we’ll come back down. No harm, no foul.”

“That seems fair,” Hermann admits. “Very well, you have a deal.”

Once again, Newt leads Hermann past the waiting guests. When they reach the front of the line, Newt high-fives the blue-eyed young man at the top. “Hey, Chuck! Meet my friend Hermann.”

“Another coaster nut, eh?” Chuck asks, his eyes twinkling.

“Well, I’m not sure,” Hermann admits.

Newt jumps in. “Hermann’s just here to inspect the coasters.”

Chuck grins. “Ah, so what you’re saying is: he’s boring!” He leans back and calls out, “Dad! Another one for you!”

A chiseled man in a similar jacket to Chuck’s walks over. “All right, let’s get these folks seated. Hello everyone!” Heads turn as people in line pay attention. “I’m Herc Hansen, and this is my son, Chuck. Welcome to Striker Eureka! Who here is nervous about riding? Do we have any first-time riders, or anyone else who’s unsure about all this?” Hermann puts his hand up, as do many others. Herc continues, “No worries! Over here with me, please.” The people who raised their hands shuffle over to Herc.

On cue, Chuck steps forward. “All right, the rest of you, do we have any daredevils, thrill-seekers, or adventurous souls? Who’s looking for a challenge?” Hermann looks over as many hands go up, including Newt’s. Chuck looks over the faces, satisfied, and nods, points, or bumps fists with several that he recognizes. “Good on ya! The rest of you, just sit tight a mo, we’ll get you on at the same time as the others, never fret!”

As Chuck’s group gathers, Chucks smile and lean close to Newt to whisper something. It looks like both of them glance at Hermann for a moment and Newt gives a nervous laugh, but Hermann may have imagined it.

Hermann turns back to Herc as the older man begins to speak to his group. “Now, if you’re worried about riding Striker because she’s big or she’s fast, I can assure you, there is nothing to be afraid of! Striker is top rated in safety, and she’s the smoothest coaster in the park. You’ll be going fast, and there are some loops, but it feels just like you’re gliding along in a lovely dream.” He steps over to the seats. “As you’ve noticed, Striker is an inverted coaster, which means you’ll be hanging from the track rather than riding on it. Your feet will dangle in space, so make sure your shoes are tied tight! It’s nothing to worry about, though: the seats close down over you like this.” He closes and opens restraint. “It’s a bit like a lift jacket, or if you prefer, like being held close in a nice, secure hug. If you’re a large-bodied individual, we want you to be comfortable, so please use these seats here. They should give you a bit more room. If anyone is still having second thoughts, feel free to step aside and sit this one out, and you’ll be in the front of the line for the next car when you’re ready, if you should wish to ride.”

Chuck calls over, “You ready there, Dad? I’ve got mine ready and rarin’ to go!”

Herc gives him a thumbs-up and waves everyone forward, so that the riders combine into a single group again. Newt steps up close to Hermann, eying the seats expectantly. Herc indicates a tall shelf with many square holes for storing items. “So, glasses, hats, flip-flops, and anything in a shallow pocket, pop ‘em in the cubbies, and we’ll auction ‘em back to you after the ride!”

“Auction?” Hermann asks Newt. “Naturally he’s joking, right?”

“Don’t worry,” Newt reassures him. “You can use my staff discount.”

Herc takes off his glasses and leaves them and his cane on a shelf. As he and Newt climb into the seats and the restraints close over them, Hermann asks Newt, “What did Chuck have to say?”

Newt’s eyes shine. “He always has ideas for how to make the ride more fun. They’re a bit like dares: see if you can ride the whole time with your eyes closed or with your hands in the air, that sort of thing. It’s always totally safe, don’t worry!”

“And what did he recommend this time?” Hermann asks.

“The challenge is to ride the coaster in silence! No shouting or screaming.”

Hermann can’t help but smile. “And do you think you can do it?”

The car begins to climb. “Are you kidding? I’ve got this one in the bag!”

The car reaches the top of the climb, seems to pause for a moment, and descends with a rush. Hermann holds onto the two handles at chest level on his seat’s restraint and grimaces as the track turns and twists, leaning the riders first in one direction and then the other. He glances over at Newt, whose lips are white from how tightly he is pressing them together, his eyes wide with the effort. He sees Hermann looking at him and gives him a grin while throwing up the horns.

They reach the first loop, and Hermann feels the world turn upside-down, his feet rolling up over his head. As much as he had dreaded this moment, once he is riding the loop, he is too wrapped up in the experience to feel any fear. As they ride down the other side of the loop, he is no longer grimacing, and instead shouts with exhilaration. Newt, his challenge forgotten, whoops along with him.

Hermann starts to lean into the turns, looking forward to the way his center of balance shifts with the ride. He sees the second loop approaching and holds on in anticipation. They go up and over, and this time Hermann releases the handholds and puts his hands up with a yelp of joy. He looks over at Newt, who grins back at him. Hermann can feel himself smiling foolishly, but he does not even care.

Knowing that the two loops are behind him, Hermann tries to savor the rest of the ride, but all too soon they pull back into the station. The restraints release and Hermann and Newt walk over to the shelf to retrieve their things.

“You were awesome!” Newt says, giving Hermann a friendly bump with his shoulder. “No fear!”

Hermann ducks his head shyly. “Well, I wouldn’t say that, but I did enjoy myself.”

“That is so great, man, seriously.” Newt can’t seem to stop smiling. The adrenaline from the ride is probably at least partially to blame.

Chuck stands near the shelf, holding a roll of rock music-themed stickers. “So, who made it without screaming?”

Several riders stride up, pride shining on their faces, and Chuck gives them all a handshake, fist-bump, or high-five before handing them a sticker. Several have notebooks specifically for collecting such stickers. When Newt starts to get in line behind a pudgy preteen, Hermann smiles and shakes his head. “Don’t you dare!”

“Aww,” Newt says, with a comical slouch.

They retrieve their things from the cubbies. “No auction, then, I take it?” Hermann asks as he leans on his cane.

“It’s a silent auction,” Newt says, giving Hermann a sly sideways look. “You just agreed to pay… a million bajillion bucks for your glasses!”

“Lucky for me there is no such number,” Hermann retorts.

Herc comes over, his eyes narrowed as he inspects Hermann for his reaction. “All right there, mate?”

“Just fine!” Hermann replies. “Like you said, it was a wonderful ride!”

Herc puffs his chest a bit. “Glad to hear it! Maybe next time you will be ready to take one of Chuck’s challenges?”

Hermann hesitates. “Er… perhaps…”

Chuck winks. “Let’s see, maybe you’ll have to hold the hand of the person next to you?”

Hermann is not sure what to make of that. “Oh… er…”

“Let’s go!” Newt says quickly, ushering Hermann toward the exit. “Two more coasters to go!”

They make their way from the coaster. “What do you think Chuck meant by that?” Hermann asks Newt.

Newt’s face is flushed, probably from the ride. “Well, um, who knows? Probably best not to think about it too hard. Are you ready for the next one?”

Hermann thinks. “I should be ready by the time we get there, yes.”

“Sweet! You seem to be getting the hang of roller coasters!” He points ahead. “Next up: Crimson Typhoon!”

As its name implies, the roller coaster looming in front of them is painted bright red, with gold trim. The track featured numerous loops and corkscrews, and as they watch, a car full of guests goes spinning past, the riders’ screams rising and falling in pitch.

Hermann slows down a bit, his gaze traveling thoughtfully over the course of the coaster. Newt studies him. “I think you got this. You conquered loops on Striker, so corkscrews should be no trouble. Plus, Crimson is not quite as fast, and you’re able to keep your feet on the floor. So, bonus!”

Hermann pulls himself up a little straighter. He feels a little less confident this close to the coaster, but he is determined to attempt it. “Yes, I think I should be all right! Lead on!”

They climb the gilded staircase. Hermann says, “This certainly seems to be the most beautiful coaster at the park!”

“You should tell the Weis that! They’ll get a kick out of it.”

After skipping the line, they meet the operators, identical triplets in matching red athletic gear.

“Newt!” one of them calls out. He gives a bright grin. “I thought we told you stop coming around here, man, we’re trying to run a respectable coaster!”

“Oh, is that right?” Newt shoots back. “Guys, meet Hermann. He’s as respectable as they come! Hermann, this is Hu Wei, and Jin and Cheung. They’re brothers.”

“You don’t say,” Hermann deadpans.

“Wondering how Newt can tell us apart?” Jin asks. Hermann does a double-take, as he was wondering exactly that. “Everyone always wants to know! I’ll let you in on the secret: Hu is the plain one, and Cheung is the goofy-looking one. I’m the handsome one.”

The three of them start talking over each other in what must be a familiar routine.

Newt lets them happily bicker for a while, then asks, “So, what’s the configuration going to be today, guys?”

Hermann narrows his eyes, confused. “Configuration?”

Newt nods. “Crimson Typhoon can be run a number of ways: straight through, or backward, or halfway and back, or the famous Thundercloud Formation, where it runs all the way through, then backwards, then straight through again. That’s recommended only for the most hard-core coaster fans, though!”

Hermann smirks. “So how many times have you done that one?”

“I’ve lost track,” Newt says, his smile blissful. He turns back to the Weis. “So what’ll it be?”

Cheung gives Newt finger-guns. “For you, Newt, we’re always happy to do the Thundercloud Formation!”

Newt glances at Hermann “Maybe let’s just do it straight through once today.”

Hu nods. “That works. It’s a great ride no matter what!”

Newt half-smiles at Hermann. “So, shall we board?”

Hermann leaves his glasses and cane in a cubby like the one at Striker Eureka, and they find their seats. Newt looks at Hermann with a goofy smile on his face, until Hermann has to ask, “What is it?”

“This is so cool,” Newt says. “Seeing you getting into roller coasters, I mean. I guess I’ve gotten so used to riding them, that I hadn’t really thought about what it’s like for a newbie to experience them for the first time.”

Hermann looks around, self-conscious. “I have ridden other roller coasters before, you know. It’s just that it had been a while.”

“Uh-huh. Well, in any case, it’s still really cool.”

Hermann wishes Newt would look somewhere else, but fortunately the train starts to move, and Newt’s attention swivels instantly to the track ahead. “Here we go!”

At first, Crimson Typhoon feels similar to Cherno Alpha, except smoother, faster, and quieter. They zoom up and down a few hills, with Newt giving little whoops. Hermann is too busy anticipating the loops and corkscrews ahead, so everything seems to pass quickly. Then they reach the first loop. As they start to climb it, Hermann feels a surge of adrenaline that is beginning to feel familiar. They approach the top of the loop, and Hermann’s guts clench as exhilaration turns to terror. Unlike on Striker Eureka, the loops on Crimson Typhoon allow him to look down, and the moment he does, his stomach does a somersault as he feels as though he is falling from the coaster. In his mind’s eye, he can clearly picture the ground rushing up toward him as he plummets to grievous injury and death.

The loop is over, bringing with it a moment’s relief, but Hermann knows the respite is temporary. Sure enough, he spots a corkscrew ahead, and a moment later he feels himself pressed to the side of his restraints as the car lifts and spins. Now he is not only picturing himself falling to his death, but also being flung from the car. As the corkscrew continues to mash him sideways, he glimpses the park guests walking beside the coaster and imagines his embarrassing last moments as people come over to see who flew from the roller coaster, shaking their heads and muttering how everybody else managed to stay in their seats, wondering what this one person did wrong. Hermann hopes that he would at least not hit anyone. It would be bad enough to die in an embarrassing way, without taking someone with him. As they come out of the corkscrew, he wonders which would be more embarrassing: dying from being flung by a coaster, or dying from being hit by someone flung from a coaster.

Once they are on the other side, Hermann unclenches his jaw and takes a gasping breath. They go through some hills and valleys, which Hermann suffers with a kind of grim acceptance, knowing that soon there will be another corkscrew. There it is: he can see it approaching. His stomach heaves in anticipation. It occurs to him that the chances of throwing up are statistically much higher than falling from the ride. He estimates that, given the direction of the corkscrew, the most likely trajectory for his vomit would be toward the person next to him. Meaning, Newt.

He looks at Newt, who has his head flung back as he lets out a long whoop. Hermann tries to decide whether it it would be unprofessional to vomit on a business contact, or whether it would serve Newt right. Perhaps Newt senses Hermann looking at him, because he turns to Hermann. Whatever he was about to say, he pauses when he sees Hermann’s face. Seeing the look of concern on Newt’s face almost makes him feel bad about the very real possibility of vomiting on him.

Newt shouts, “Keep your eyes ahead! Hold onto the handles, and most importantly, keep breathing!”

Hermann’s mind latches onto these three pieces of advice like a drowning person clutching for a life preserver. He takes his eyes off Newt and looks straight ahead, just as they enter the corkscrew. He can feel himself starting to look down and to the side, but with an effort he keeps his eyes forward. Holding onto the handles is easier, but thinking about it makes him aware of how tight his shoulders have gotten. He rolls his shoulders as much as he can while being pressed against the restraints by G-forces. Between the effort of keeping his eyes forward and his attempts to loosen his cramped muscles, it is a good thing he consciously reminds himself to breathe. He breathes in through his nose and exhales through his mouth. In and out, in and out, as they go around and around the corkscrew.

Finally, the corkscrew is finished, and the train banks around a big turn. Hermann hears Newt’s voice. “Almost there! Just one more loop!”

Hermann looks over to shout a response. Newt’s big brown eyes are on Hermann, and before Hermann can say anything, Newt shouts, “Eyes forward, dude! You’re doing great!”

Hermann manages a shaky nod and a quick smile before turning ahead. They dip, then launch up into the loop. Hermann keeps his eyes ahead, focusing on the track as it blurs past. Beyond the track, he sees sky, then ground, then the rest of the roller coaster before him.

He breathes a sigh of relief as they complete the ride and come to a stop. When the restraints release and rise up, he thinks that he could sit like that for a while longer, just breathing and recovering. He knows that they have to vacate the ride to make room for the next group of riders. When he stands, he feels like the world is still moving around him. He stumbles, but someone’s hands on his arm keep him from falling.

“I gotcha,” Newt says. His eyes are bright from the ride, but his voice is gentle. “Come on. We’re not in any rush. One step at a time.”

Hermann nearly falls as he steps from the car onto the station. “Coming through!” Someone calls, and Hermann sees Cheung approaching with a bucket, flanked by Hu and Jin. Cheung helps Newt guide Hermann to the side of the platform so that people can go by, while Hu and Jin screen them from curious eyes.

Hermann takes the bucket and holds it under his mouth, his stomach churning. He has a few close calls, but does not bring up anything. After a little while, he starts to feel better. “I think I’ll be okay,” he says.

“Are you sure?” Newt asks, peering closely at Hermann’s face.

“I… think so.”

Hermann tries to give the bucket to Cheung, but Cheung holds up his hands. “You can hang onto that for a bit. We’ve got a bunch, and you might still need it.”

Hermann thinks about refusing, not wanting to be seen leaving the roller coaster with a bucket, but he decides to err on the side of caution and nods his head in thanks.

The world has almost stopped spinning, so he allows Newt to lead him down, leaning alternately on the railing and Newt. Once they are back in the main park, Newt points to some tables by the gift shop. “Come on, let’s sit down for a bit. I’ll get you something to drink.”

Hermann is convinced that everyone is looking at them as he staggers toward the tables, one arm over Newt’s shoulder and the other clutching a bucket while Newt carries Hermann’s cane. They arrive at the table and Hermann melts gratefully onto the bench, placing the bucket on the table and laying his head down on his folded arms. He closes his eyes and concentrates on breathing.

He hears Newt leave the table. After some time, Newt returns and places something down on the table. Hermann does not feel ready to open his eyes yet.

Newt sits next to Hermann and begins to gently rub his back. Hermann feels momentarily annoyed by the gesture, but it feels so good that he quickly changes his mind.

“How are you feeling?” Newt asks, his voice soft.

Hermann searches for an appropriate analogy. “Like a time lapse of Foucault’s Pendulum.”

“Huh.” Newt is quiet for a second. Hermann thinks the reference must have gone over Newt’s head when he says, “You know, that’s very evocative.”

“Thank you.” Hermann opens one eye. Newt, who had been looking at him with his eyebrows steepled in concern, forces a smile. Hermann raises his head with an effort and opens his other eye. The world is already looking more familiar than it did a few minutes ago. He sees a mug nearby with a teabag steeping inside. The tab of paper at the end of the string reveals that the tea is a substandard brand, but Hermann takes the mug in both hands and sips from it anyway.

Newt leans forward. “Is it good?”

Hermann feels the edges of his mouth twitch. “Terrible, but it’s helping.” He takes another sip.

They sit like that for a while. Hermann listens to groups of excited park guests passing by, discussing what to do next. Crimson Typhoon roars by a few times. Newt opens his mouth as though he is about to say something, but he closes it again and waits for Hermann to finish resting.

When Hermann has finished his tea, he stands experimentally. His feet feel firm under him. He breathes in deeply through his nose, lifts his cane, and turns to Newt. “Right, well, I believe I am recovered.” He bows a little. “I appreciate your patience.”

Newt stands, too. “Yeah, dude, of course! I’m really sorry about making you ride Crimson Typhoon.”

Hermann clucks his tongue and scrunches his face for a moment. “Nonsense, you did not make me do anything. You encouraged it, yes, but it was my decision.”

Newt nods, his hands on his hips. “Okay, yeah, but… I still feel crappy.”

“You needn’t,” Hermann assures him, “but thank you for your concern.”

“Should we walk around a bit?” Newt asks. He gestures toward the nearby building, which is painted garish colors and hung with neon signs bearing Chinese characters. “How about we visit the gift shop?”

“Sure,” Hermann replies. They walk inside.

Despite the somewhat ramshackle outside, the inside of the store is very tasteful, with dark wooden shelves stocked with souvenir items like keychains, snowglobes, and T-shirts. The park’s eagle logo is everywhere. One shirt has the logo with the slogan, “I cancelled the apocalypse and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.” Two facing shelves hold figures of varying sizes and price ranges, one with robots based on the park’s roller coasters, the other with kaiju who look significantly more menacing than the more cuddly versions walking around the park.

Plastic tubs on the ground are full of foam weapons like the ones Hermann saw used on the mascot when he entered the park. Several kids paw through the boxes, trying to decide which ones they want to wield.

Hermann picks up a mug with the park’s logo and the word “DRIFT.” He looks at Newt. “Drift?” he asks.

Newt, who is holding a mug with the word “COMPATIBLE,” fumbles it and puts the mug back quickly. “I’ll tell you about that later.”

A voice from up ahead asks, “Let me know if there’s anything in particular that you’re looking for.” Standing behind the counter is a white-haired man in a red brocade jacket. His eyes are hidden behind the round lenses of his sunglasses. Behind him, a refrigerator contains a variety of soft drinks, with each shelf lit from underneath by a yellow-green glow. The man gives Hermann a broad smile, exposing several gold teeth.

Newt steps up next to Hermann. “No, thanks, we’re just browsing!”

The man leans back with exaggerated surprise. “Hey there, Newt, I didn’t see you. Your order just came in this morning. Let me grab it for ya.”

Newt’s voice rises in pitch as he calls out, “No, that’s okay, I’ll come by for it later.”

“No trouble at all,” the man says, waving a hand expansively. He turns and steps into a back room.

Newt keeps his voice low, which catches Hermann by surprise. “That’s Hannibal Chau. He runs the gift shop, and to be honest, I’m not even sure if Stacker ever officially hired him.”

“Are you saying he’s unlicensed?”

“I don’t know. I mean, I kind of get the impression that, if you were ask him, he’d produce any type of license you might want.”

Hermann quirks his lips. “With the ink on the paper still damp, I’m sure?”

Newt shrugs. “Stacker’s okay with him doing his thing, and that’s good enough for me.”

Chau comes back with a cardboard box, which he places on the counter. The box’s sides are covered with tape and stickers in a variety of languages. “Here we go! I was able to acquire everything on your list. Don’t ask me how, it’s not something you need to worry about. You know, I’m so good, sometimes I even impress myself.”

Newt waves his hands. “Oh, there’s no rush. I’ll come by later for it.”

Chau’s eyebrows rise behind his sunglasses. “Nonsense! I know how much you look forward to these. Now, let’s take a look inside, shall we?” He reaches into his pocket and, with a flick of his wrist, produces a golden butterfly knife. He spins the handles with a series of clicks and clacks. Hermann’s breath catches in his throat until he looks at the blade and sees that it is not a knife after all, but a letter opener.

Newt raises one hand. “You don’t need to open it, I can just… oh, I see you’ve opened it.”

Chau cocks his head and smiles a Cheshire cat smile. “Let’s start things off with a box of these.” He removes a box of Pocky and lays it on the counter. “And another box of these… and another box… and another box.” Each box is a different flavor, some of which must only be available in Japan. He stacks each box on top of the other.

Newt puts his hands into his pockets and bounces on the balls of his feet. “Okay, yep, great, just some snacks, so glad you could find those.”

“Oh, this looks interesting,” Chau says.

“What?” Newt asks, his eyes widening.

Chau removes a 6 pack of Ramuné bottles wrapped in paper. “Something to wash it down,” Chau says.

“Uh-huh. Thank you, we really should be going, but I’ll be back later to--”

“And what’s this?” Chau reaches into the box and lifts out a Gundam model box. He checks a number on the box and gives a low whistle. “So many parts! Clearly for the serious hobbyist only.” He gives it a shake.

“Be careful with that!” Newt exclaims, snatching the box from Chau.

Chau raises his hands in surrender. “No harm done.”

Newt runs his hand over the front of the box. “This one’s been a long time coming.”

Hermann cranes his neck to get a better look. “Wait, let me see that!”

Newt waves the box as he talks. “Okay, yeah, it’s a nerdy hobby, but it’s really not that different from assembling model planes or train sets or, or, or ships in bottles--”

“Nevermind all that,” Hermann says, taking the box from Newt.

“Hey!” Newt squawks. He makes a grab for the box, but Hermann turns away from him, his eyes fixed on the box.

“This set hasn’t been released yet, not even in Japan!” He looks from Newt to Chau. “How did you get this?”

Chau gives his jacket lapels a pull. “I have a source.”

Newt gazes at Hermann as though seeing him for the first time. “You collect Gundams?”

Hermann felt his face grow warm. “Well, I wouldn’t say I collect them, necessarily. I wouldn’t want to imply that my skill in modelling, or my investment of time and energy, is comparable to--”

Newt interrupts him. “You collect Gundams. That’s cool! Which one’s your favorite?”

Chau clears his throat. “Hate to break up the dweeb-fest, but there’s one more thing.” He looks over the items he has already removed. “So far, you’ve got your food, your drink, and a leisure-time activity. So all that’s left,” he reaches into the box, “is some reading material.”

A thick paperback tome crests the edge of the box, and Hermann glimpses a cover featuring a bespectacled young man entwined in blue vines. Before Hermann can get a good look, Newt bounds over to Chau, forces the book back into the box, and starts to pile boxes of Pocky on top. He lifts in the pack of Ramuné bottles inside, then gently takes the Gundam from Hermann and adds it to the box.

“Would you mind holding onto these a bit longer?” Newt asks Chau. “I’ll come by for them later.”

Chau shrugs. “Sure, suit yourself.” He picks up the box and sets it down behind the counter.

Newt leads Hermann from the gift shop, perhaps a little faster than necessary. “There’s only one more coaster left on the tour,” he explains, then hurries to add, “which you don’t have to ride! I’d just like to introduce you to the guys who run it.”

Hermann gives a tight-lipped smile. “Thank you. I would like to meet them, yes.”

“Are you feeling up to a walk?”

“Yes, a walk sounds nice.”

Newt leads the way. Hermann notices that, despite Newt’s obvious eagerness, he makes sure not to get too far ahead of Hermann, so that Hermann does not have to hurry after him with his cane. As they move further from Crimson Typhoon, the game booths change from sports-themed games to classic games like a ring toss and target shooting. Hermann settles into a comfortable pace, and soon they reach the final roller coaster.

“Lady Danger!” Newt says, raising both his hands to indicate the navy blue coaster rising above them. “The park’s flagship ride. She may not be as fast as Striker or as flashy as Crimson, but she’s just a great overall experience.” They start to climb the stairs. “She’s an older coaster, though not as old as Cherno Alpha. You’d never know her age, though, since she just recently went through a renovation!”

“Oh?” Hermann asks, intrigued.

Newt nods, warming to his favorite subject. “We had always kept her in good shape, of course, but she was starting to show her age. With each passing year, she was getting to be more of a pain to maintain. The ride experience wasn’t as great as it could have been, either. So we shut her down for a while for an overhaul. Anything that couldn’t be repaired was completely rebuilt. The result was a faster, more fun coaster, which is also easier to maintain. Probably safer, too,” he adds. “Not that she was ever unsafe, of course.”

“Of course,” Hermann agrees. He pauses on a landing and studies Newt, who stops and looks back at him. “You know, from speaking to you, I really do believe that you would never allow one of your roller coasters to fall to disrepair.”

Newt gives a self-conscious laugh. “I mean, yeah. To be honest, I probably take better care of these coasters than I do myself!” He looks down and tightens his tie a little, with the effect of making it even more off-center.

“Of course, I still intend to do a thorough inspection of the roller coasters.”

“Right! Sure.” Newt’s voice rises, but he controls it with an effort. “You’ll want to do a thorough…” he pauses and swallows. “...inspection.” As he speaks, his glasses get slightly foggy. Glad for a distraction, he takes them off and wipes them on his shirt, but he somehow manages to get his tie wrapped around the lens. “Haha, okay, hm,” he says as he untangles the tie, muttering to himself. As he does, a glob of mustard that had been on the tie gets transferred onto glasses “Oh… oh jeez.” By this point, he is so flustered that he puts his glasses back on face, despite the giant smear of mustard across the lenses.

Hermann does not want to laugh at another’s misfortune, but the sight is so endearing that he can’t help but smile. “Here,” he says, taking Newt’s glasses from him. He produces a cloth from his pocket and wipes Newt’s glasses before handing them to back Newt.

“Hey, thanks,” Newt says, eyes wide as he gazes at Hermann. “Aw, no, now you got mustard on your…” He blinks, and screeches, “Monogrammed handkerchief?”

“Oh, it’s nothing,” Hermann says.

“But I ruined it!”

“No, it’s fine, really. I have several.” Hermann waves the handkerchief, not sure what to do with it. “In fact, here! You may have it.”

Amazingly, Newt’s voice rises even higher. “Are you serious?”

Hermann smiles. “In case of further mustard.”

Suddenly they are both at a loss for words. After an awkward moment of silence, they turn at together and resume climbing the stairs. They pass the people waiting in line and reach the top. Standing there is a young woman with blue streaks in her hair. She grins at the sight of Newt.

“Hey, Newt!” she exclaims, taking her hands out of the pockets of her dark jumpsuit.

“Mako!” Newt and Mako exchange a complicated handshake. “Mako, this is Hermann. I was just telling him about your restoration project on Lady Danger here.”

Mako turns to Hermann. “It is nice to meet you.” She extends her hand.

Hermann worries about what to do, but she takes his hand and gives him a normal handshake. He smiles in relief. “Likewise, I’m sure.”

Newt continues, “Hermann’s here looking over the coasters.”

Hermann clarifies, “I haven’t actually started my inspection yet. Newt has given me a tour of the park and helped me get the feel of the roller coasters.”

“By riding them!” Newt enthuses.

A man’s voice says, “That’s the best way to do it!” A blond young man in a sweater walks over. He offers a handshake to Hermann. “Hi, I’m Raleigh.”

Hermann shakes Raleigh’s hand. “Hermann Gottlieb.”

An empty train pulls up to the station, and Raleigh tilts his head toward it. “So, are you going to be riding this one?”

When Hermann hesitates, Mako gets a serious look on her face. “All of the retrofits and repairs were completed well above code.”

“Oh, I have no doubt!” Hermann says with sincerity. “It’s just, I have ridden more roller coasters in the past hour than in the past… let’s see…” The math is easy for him, of course, but he is unsure if he wants to admit the result to Newt, Mako, and Raleigh.

“No pressure, dude,” Newt says.

Raleigh raises his eyebrows with a surprisingly gentle look. “If you want to sit this one out, Lady Danger’s not going anywhere.”

Hermann breathes out, then nods, his mind made up. “Yes, I think that would be best.”

“You won’t be riding it?” Newt asks, not quite hiding his disappointment.

“You go ahead,” Hermann says with a fond smile. “I’ll wait for you at the bottom.”

Newt turns to get on, then pauses. “I’ll save it for next time. Um, there will be a next time, right?”

“Absolutely,” Hermann assures him.“You may depend on it!”

“Well, in that case,” Newt says. “Here’s my number.”

“That’s not necessary. I have the park’s number, and I will arrange my subsequent visits through Mr. Pentecost’s office.”

“But you might have some questions,” Newt says earnestly. “About the coasters. Or, you know. Anything.”

Mako snorts, and Raleigh turns away to hide his grin.

Hermann starts to smile. “I suppose I may have an inquiry or two. You had better give me your number after all.”


End file.
